Communicating by Listening


The goal of a debate or a discussion about the Faith should not be to win; the goal should be to share Christ. This involves more than just telling people what Scripture says, it involves listening to where they are coming from and then giving them an answer that meets the pain and angst that they are experiencing in their life. Today, Jeff gives you ten points on how to become a better listener to others so that you can touch people’s hearts and answer their questions with the message of the gospel.






Ten Ways to Become a Better Listener


  1. Be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger. (James 1:19)
  2. Look into their eyes. Don’t be distracted. Don’t look around or beyond them.
  3. Love them by listening to their heart.
  4. Ask the Lord to help you listen to where they are coming from.
  5. Recognize that your response may not come all at once, but in stages.
  6. Avoid being offended by what they say, don’t take it personally.
  7. Be willing to change if they have a good point.
  8. Don’t formulate thoughts when the other person is speaking. Just listen.
  9. Remember their name and use it often.
  10. You don’t need to cover every point.



Other Tips


  1. Ask follow up questions and repeat back to them what they said in your own words.
  2. Your body language is important. (e.g. Your eyes and mouth can give away that you are ready to interrupt.)
  3. Avoid any “why” questions, instead, look for information with “what” questions.



Do you have comments or questions for Jeff? Use the comment box below, or email Jeff at You may hear your question or comment in an upcoming podcast episode!

1 Comment

  1. I so enjoyed LISTENING to this podcast on listening.I visualized myself in conversations and saw my shortcomings. Like you, no. 8 is one of my downfalls.
    It’s good to be reminded about this extremely important action. Yes, listening IS an Action! Thank you Mr. Cavins and belated Happy Anniversary to you!


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