When You Have a Crush on Someone in Seminary

If you have a crush on someone in the seminary, or are in the seminary and have a crush, Jackie and Bobby say to guard your heart. It’s important to set boundaries, give yourself and the other person space, and know yourself. Unhealthy bonds can wreak havoc on God’s calling for you.

If you’re a seminarian—or a woman discerning the religious life—and the feelings for this special someone are just too strong, it’s OK to discern out of the seminary or religious order. It’s OK to take time off if you have doubts about taking a lifelong vow of celibacy. And if you end up not becoming a priest or religious sister, not all is lost. We need holy husbands and wives just as much as we need holy priests and nuns.

If you have strong feelings for a seminarian or a woman discerning the religious life—which is understandable because, let’s be honest, holiness is attractive—be bold and create some distance between you and him. Someone else will come into the picture. Have faith in the plan God has for you, and it will all make sense in the end.

For more advice on this topic, Jackie and Bobby suggest Emotional Virtue by Sarah Swafford, and Jackie’s Ascension Presents video on attraction.